Stuck

How come everytime I try to write a story it ends up being about you?
Why is it that it always has to be about us....how we ended and how we began and how I got stuck?
And everytime I write...somehow I always stop and never continue...
Lots and lots of unfinished stories....because four pages after starting I start to think...
Like a little girl...
"If you wish hard enough it might come true"
"If I close my eyes and only open them when it happens..."
And then I write more....not about the story, but about what happened for me to stop writing it...
And then come the tears, first one by one, then four by four....
Sometimes I wonder if you can still sense the way I'm feeling
Sometimes I wonder if I'm like this because you might be feeling bad at the moment
Every now and then, I wonder if I ever cross your mind
And right now, I only wish I could just go and talk to you
But worse than hitting me for it, I think you just wouldn't acknowledge my existence and just keep on ignoring me. And that isn't very nice.
I wish I could talk to you so wecould finish our unfinished business.
Or was that your plan since the beggining? Torture me by not allowing us to have the final conversation...
Well here it goes! I just wanted to say.....so many stuff...
I even did it  once...wrote a whole four pages letter....which then I threw away....
Would you have wanted to read it? I guess not....
But you know what? I wish I could tell you that you're forgiven, I wish I could tell you I'm sorry, and I wish I was your best friend, just to tell you that everything will be okay, and that you can always count on me...
I also wish I could punch you in the face, but oh well....one cannot have everything...:)